MM: Planner and life

Sitting at my secretary, everything, the madness, seems arbitrary. (If it Rhymes it MUST be true).  Lately it seems that everything has been spinning and spinning, with no signs of stopping.  Hard to get a handle on things, let alone see straight.  But now I take moments like this to just sit down and just be.  Just being is incredibly important to full mental clarity, and lately I believe I’m beginning to understand exactly what that means.

Take today for an example.  Last night I took it upon myself to map out my day today, from my very “morning routine” to even posting this blog, and my meditation tonight before bed.  (Meditation Monday? haha). Waking up today knowing I had exact plans for myself, no matter how small they may seem, gave me purpose today and I actually got a lot done.  Crazy how just a simple thing like a planner could have a profound impact on ones day-to-day life.

I have practically accomplished every, single, thing on my list.  Maybe in my actual life with the bigger and much more outstanding goals, planning may not be such a bad thing after all.

I have always been the kind that likes to organize, to keep things tidy (sometimes), so I feel like I have clarity.  But if I don’t take a conscious effort on the side to really talk to myself about what it is I NEED to accomplish, it may never get done.

So I’m writing today because, indeed, it was in my planner to do so, but I am also writing to encourage everyone to take the time to reflect on the day you had and the day you WANT to have tomorrow.  Write it down, and believe me if you write it down it will be real, and you will accomplish what it is you need to accomplish. Better for you, for your mind, and for your life.

MM: Sick Days and Hazy Ways

Tis been a hot minute since the last time I posted a free flowing thought on this blog.  However, lately, under the circumstances, I have been having quite a lot of down time, thinking time, and boredom time.

Since Saturday I have been under the weather, which upon first thought I blamed on the seasonal changes.  The strange warm weather, bringing in out of the ordinary thunderstorms and rain, letting the weeds expound their seeds into the air.  Normally a little hay fever would be of little consequence to my well being, but then as time progressed I then realized, dang nabbit, this is a freaking cold.

So yes I am indeed sick.  Sniffling, coughing, hocking all sorts of things up, attempting to eat food and feeling incredibly depressed that I can’t taste it.

Who knew that the major reason why I eat is for the taste/ pleasure of it rather than the essential nutrients obtained by it.  Which is another thing I have been struggling with lately.  My weight.

Since I had been taking care of my parent’s residents and pup whilst they were away taking care of some family matters, I had endured a diet of mostly veggies for about a month.  Only to then lose 6 pounds.  Now to some this may seem not such a big deal, 10 pounds would be something to marvel at, but 6 pounds for me (on purpose) is quite a feat.  Not meaning to toot my own horn but dieting has never been my strongest suit.  I love food.  Not really to cook it but eating it is soooooooooo my cup of tea.

Even working out lately has been a chore.  I was enjoying my little routine I had established for myself, Mondays would be my “Muscle Mondays” do some cardio, come inside do some weight lifting, and then some yoga to finish it off, wednesdays would be my “Walking Wednesdays” where I would go somewhere like a park or a beautiful place and just walk, and of course Fridays, “Fitness Fridays” mostly exclusively for Tennis.  My sport of choice.  Really the ONLY sport I am partially ok at.

But then, ya know, life happens.  Get sick, have too much  to take care of at home, womanly issues out of the blue, lazy, etc. there were always excuses.  And today is no different.  Didn’t work out, womanly issues and I’m sick as a dog (never understood that expression, “Sick as a dog” are dogs always sick or when a dog is sick they are reeeeeally sick? hmmmm).

Just have to push on and see the sun rays through the haze.  Its been a trying couple of days but I know once I am through this sickness I am going to make the most of my health and get going with my life.  So many things I need to get accomplished, sometimes it takes being forced to be on your butt to really see what needs to get done and how to do it.  Posting on this blog is definitely one of those things I really want to start doing more.  So here’s to good luck and getting over this stupid cold, and for not being lazy anymore.  I can do it.

Peace love and happiness,

MourningDoves7 >*<

“A Letter To Me” Monday

Dear Me,

NOT the exclamation, “Oh Dear Me!” but really an address to myself on this day of all days.  It is the beginning of the week and change is in the air.  Soon you will be going to your first day of work (next week) so till then its just you and me and this calm keyboard at your fingertips.

Who knows what this will bring, obviously money which can be good when you need it, but what else? A new found confidence, and a new sense of self, that’s what!

You already feel its effects, the posture, the tone in your voice, the maturity in the way you think. No mean to brag about you me, but seriously you’ve been doing great these past few weeks, really stepping up on that confidence game! If only “certain” people in your life would take notice and maybe make a few changes for themselves as well.

Truly though I know you feel that way, but just think that the only person you really need is you.

The places you are already going, even down to how you dress.  Is an expression of your self worth, never be afraid to stand up for who you truly are and what you truly want.

God you are so beautiful when you love yourself.  People even see it, I know you saw those looks from those guys in the store that day.  Its not just because you are beautiful on the outside (which I know sometimes you think you’re fat and you hate your smile and call it crooked) but they see that glow.  That pure glow of love, for who you are and for the world around you.

Never stop loving the world and your life and the things you were given in it.  I know you know this but truly never forget, that the true beauty of who you truly are is when you love yourself, then the rest of the world will love you right along with you.

Me, you are doing great.  Never stop being yourself.  Never stop believing you can make it because despite what anyone ever tells you, you can.  And no matter what anyone ever promises you if you can, don’t do it for them but do it for yourself.  Love you me, love you harder stronger and longer than anyone in this world can and ever will. Then, and only then will you succeed. Stop criticizing everything you do, stop thinking you’re less than what you are, stop thinking you deserve nothing when you deserve it all.

I know you can do it, I know you will be everything you ever dreamed you could be. You are beautiful. You are wanted. You are loved.

My best regards, my deepest love,