I am a dancing cloud that no one will ever catch an island I have made entirely for myself. Coconut ice cream and dagger seas. You can join in the foot pattern or merely observe from your plane passing by. But I will never leave I will not forsake this bird of my soul that has nested so deep inside that she can’t be caught or tamed. I am a dark fire ball that has landed to amaze and bring you warmth but I will not be dampened nor will I ever be explained. No one knows where I had come from or if I will keep digging deep into the soil that can’t keep me still. I vibrate red, an eternal flame that shatters mirrors and tears walls. I am the open air the rolling of the rocks that fall as you kick them down the mountain. Once I am moved I will keep moving not because I do not want to be where I was but to go where I know I’m supposed to go. And where is that? I don’t know. I am a mere contradiction that carves my own definition in to the tree of life. No words or iron clad fists can nail me. For I don’t even know my purpose but I know what I am. I am free and like this bird who is deep in my chest as I push off this mortal coil I will inhabit the nearest star and burn it up as bright as the noon day sky so that every single cell in this universe has a piece of what I was. Nothing but pure and unending desire passion and love that can be felt in the bones of your toes and the cells on the tip of your tongue. Taste with your heart, feel with your mind, and love with every inch of who you are and then you can see what it is to truly be me.
“Fearing the lonesome
grabbing what you can,
Better to be
suffocated then breathe empty air.”
– Danielle McHale >*<
It doesn’t matter how hard you try,
Flowers will always die.
Feed them, love them, but birds are still meant to fly.
As the saying goes if you love someone let them go,
Yet I still lie in wait for them to come back, An ever growing battle with my heart
To and fro
What if they never come back?
What if it isn’t so?
But one thing I’ve noticed
And as true as it may be
What’s important if your love for me.
So self, listen dearly for I will only say this once,
Love yourself the greatest of them all.
You will never let yourself down, you will never let yourself fall.
Be determined in all that you do,
And when you are ready to say the words say them true.
Say I love you, to you.
The trees they fold me in
A disastrous quiver of excitement.
I am overtaken.
Deeper and deeper till there is no more
I am but the earth
a child of the moon and lore.
To believe is to have, to have is to believe
Those who don’t believe are left in want.
Tangles realities finding happiness to weave.
It is but a dream this reality
The truth is in your mind
Just hidden away waiting for you to find.
It longs to be free it longs to fly
Leave it for too long it will die.
Life is your work of art every moment your carving tool
How will you use it?
Smashing it and fixing the pieces?
Living brightly and happily inching your way through masterpieces?
Creeping slowly and yet it waits,
Under the sheet of your daydreams.
If it does not find a home in your mind
there are other ways.
Sinking down below
It travels through your veins.
With a cannonball it takes a swim in your stomach.
There you shall feel its pains,
It hits you and squeezes you
till you can’t take anymore.
It screams,”Give in to me!”
But you will not, no matter how great the pain.
Staying strong you have felt its hollering presence.
Do not listen to its close, loud, whispers.
You are not worthless,
You are not alone.
For above a light has always shone
And below the earth to hold you.
You don’t need anyone to make you feel like you.
You don’t need anyone to keep you together like glue.
You are beautiful just the way you are
Love yourself, and be your own best friend
A love that is worthy
Till the end.
*Author’s Note: Today I have felt the cruel clutches of loneliness and its depraving words. Trust me when I say that I know the darkness but I know the light and its there where I want to stay. Tell yourself you love you everyday. It isn’t sad to say that we are our own best friends, because its true. Pure, purest self love (not to be confused with selfishness) is the most important love we can ever allow ourselves to have. Love yourself and you can truly love others.
It never seemed enough
All those whispering sorrows
Vanishing into the deep mist of tomorrows.
Clasped together your hands never let go
Your hands holding only yours
Filling your red wine into sores.
I am a constituent to your love
Begging for it pleading for it
But the irony is beside it.
The more I want the less you give
The less I want the more is there
What a pain if not want, then what hope to bare?
We are a tangled love affair
So complicated and everywhere.
But it is you I long to share
Shaving my head just to give you locks of hair.
You are a stable independent man
who jousts his compassion with others to share
But I give myself with none left to bare.
For it is you, my tangled sweet love
That I am yours and yours alone.
Till none of my heart is left and
To you this wretched but beautiful pain I will only condone.
For only a moment in your eyes
That glisten of pure love
is worth every set of lies.